August 28, 2006

how I discovered i was in the wrong major

Harder, Monica and Sativa Saposnek. "Observation and Analysis of Heart Rate in the Frog." Biology 101 Lab Report, Reed College (1992): 3.

I am mortified in retrospect that Sativa and I actually handed this in as our lab report.

And yet I remember how much fun we had writing this "Materials and Methods" section, how little we actually understood, and how much we hated analysing data and putting it into language as dry and tasteless as a salt-free cracker. Not to mention, we were at Reed—an environment which fed our intellects as it fueled our rebellion against them. We were learning how to wade through the boggiest theories and come out the other end with a decent paper in hand and our sides aching from laughter or tears or both. Unfortunately, we had to dissect a few frogs along the way.

This is the document that cemented our friendship. We had taken turns all night at her computer trying to write it, not understanding how to analyse and interpret our data correctly. We were exhausted. At one point, I broke down crying I was so frustrated and stuck. Sativa calmed me, ordered me to bed and took over. Sometime later, I awoke to her crumpled at the foot of my bed, stifling her own sobs. I stumbled to her side and burst into tears which sent us both into fits of screeching, crawling, hysterical laughter.

Somehow, we got the lab report finished and turned in on time. Somehow, we got a B on it. Somehow, we weren't thrown out of Bio101 for academic insolence. And somehow, I decided to major in Literature.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm a college professor. I give you an 'A'.

Did you really change majors?